Monday, March 3, 2008

Resignation Day

Well, today we made it official. We drafted our resignation letter and sent it to our Bishop. It is a rather liberating experience but I can't help but feel a bit sad. This closes a very long chapter in my life and opens a new one. It will take time to navigate through the uncharted waters outside of Mormonism but I am anxious to get started. It will be nice having my wonderful wife by my side as we work together to write our new story.

The church has taught me many valuable things and I owe a lot to those that have helped teach me the values and principles I try to live each and every day. Without them, I'm not sure what kind of a person and where I would be today.

I want to express my appreciation to my Bishop and Stake President. They are both great men and they mean a lot to me. I hope that they will be able to accept and understand our reasons for leaving. They have been tremendous examples to me and I hope that I can be like them in many ways.

This by no means puts an end to the feelings of resentment I have regarding the parts of the church that have been hidden from me for some many years. I know the process of getting over those feelings will take time. I am still researching the church's history as I am more intrigued by it then ever. I will continue to express my thoughts on what I find here on this blog as I find it somewhat cathartic.

5 comments:

  1. I can't resist commenting since it looks like I might be the only current Mormon commenting:) I (as well as many of your other friends from the last chapter of your life)am happy for you and Amy that you feel you have found peace and freedom. I have seen all of this information in my own search for truth,interpretted it differently, and found truth in the Church. However, in my own search, I never doubted there was a God. How can you see the miracle that is Megan and think there is no God? Or at least some kind of Greater Power. In your continued search, try to find proof there is a God and that is where you will find true peace.

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  2. Melissa,
    Thank you for reading my blog. I appreciate your comments and look forward to hearing your views on other topics I will be posting about. I understand that many people have come to a different conclusion about the church then I have and I respect that. Unfortunately, my lack of free time has only allowed me the time to post the first of the many issues I have regarding Joseph Smith and church doctrine. What I have written so far is just the tip of the iceberg and additional topics will be coming this week. I like to think of myself as currently being agnostic, which means that I can neither confirm nor deny the existence of God. Will I always be this way? I don't know. But right now I can not bring myself to believe.
    Thank you for being such a good friend to my wife. You are always welcome here.

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  3. Hello! I like your blog and will continue following it as you post your reflections on Mormonism.

    On another note, I am curious to hear about how you are going to raise your daughter. One of my wife's biggest reasons for going to Church is the fact that the Church teaches good morals. I am of the opinion that those things can be found outside of the Church, too. but I admit that it is nice to have something already prepared and all I have to do is just pass it on.

    Will you continue teaching Christian stories? Other generic fables? Is there a book on "How to raise a child in an agnostic home"?

    This is probably a dumb comment. It's just that the Church has so much influence in its members' lives that I'm not sure how people outside of the church do things. I guess I'm trying to test the water.

    --Jabez

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  4. Jabez – That is a very valid question. I am fortunate that my wife has also come to the same conclusions I have on her own account and is making this journey with me. She grew up Christian so she has more of a foundation to fall back on then I do. We will raise our daughter based on traditional Trinitarian Christian beliefs which would include Bible stories. I am looking into more of the “eastern philosophies” which focus on the inner self. I looked the other day at a book on the “Tao” and I liked a lot that it had to say. I hope to incorporate some of those teachings into the way I interact with my child. I pray with her every night and we still sing some primary songs to her before she goes to bed.
    I am at a strange cross road in that I have a natural tendency to believe in God but I cannot trust any church to tell me the best way to do that. With that said, I have been going to church with my wife and daughter trying to learn more about the Trinitarian beliefs because I know very little about it having only been taught LDS beliefs. One day I may decide to change my mind regarding God but right now I am hovering in disbelief. I think that it is sad that many members think that they are the only/best source for moral teachings. My wife grew up outside of the church and was a better person then most of the Mormons she knew in High School. My suggestion would be to take this time to explore and discover all the different viewpoints that are out there and pick the one that is best for you. I think that if your wife sees that you are not falling apart outside of the church and still growing personally she will not have as hard of a time accepting your change in beliefs. Thank you for reading!

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  5. Wow! I had no idea!

    I also went through this at one point, and my testimony is all the stronger now for having questioned it all.

    That's not to say that you should go back to Mormonism if it's not bringing you peace. I really believe that everyone has the right to their own life journey and deserve respect, no matter what their choices, and I'll be interested in reading and commenting!

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